PARENTING – POSITIVE BODY IMAGE
Nurturing a child's positive body image
SELF CONFIDENCE AS WE KNOW IT IS DIRECTLY RELATED TO OUR BODY IMAGE.
The first comments children hear from the adults around them are statements relating to their physical appearance. "Wow, he has a head of hair! What beautiful eyes! She has long fingers like her mother," and so it continues. As the child grows, it is the child's physical progress like walking, gripping, crawling and speaking which draws attention. And so, from very young a child is creating a body image. Body image is also intertwined with a sense of physical competence and ability.
Children develop a body image from the feedback they receive and so it goes without saying that the more positive the body image, the more confident the child will feel.
USE EVERY OPPORTUNITY TO COMPLIMENT YOUR CHILD.
"You have beautiful eyes, they're as blue as the sky on a sunny day”.
There is a story of a ballet teacher who wanted to compliment all of her pupils. To one little girl who didn't do so well as a ballerina she said: "You have the most beautiful neck, like the most gracious of swans.” In later years the child realised what the teacher what was doing, but at the time she felt good about herself.
FOCUS ON WHAT THE CHILD CAN DO; EMPHASISE EFFORT AND PARTICIPATION ABOVE WINNING.
One mom, whose husband focused solely on winning, used to organise a special picnic in her child's favourite park the night before a contest, to celebrate her child's participation. This took away the focus on the results. However, when your child achieves great results, she/he will also need recognition for it.
Siblings often measure themselves against each other, so be careful to see your children as individuals, rather than expect all of your children to share the same passions.
ONE'S BODY IMAGE IS ALSO LINKED TO ONES' SENSE OF FAMILY AND ONE'S ROOTS.
Most children will do activities at school relating to body image. At home one can take it one step further by comparing your hands with your child's. Look into the mirror together and discuss what you see. ”You have a nose like mom, but ears like dad.” "Do you think your hands will grow to be as big as dads?”
Challenge your children with age appropriate tasks that will make them feel good about themselves. Children love to be timed as they run a certain distance or to see how many lengths they can swim or how far they can bodysurf in the waves.
Children who feel good about themselves physically will have a lot more confidence to face life's challenges than those who don't.
All children should have ample opportunity to run around, climb, skip, swim, go on walks and excercise. Being physically fit is as important as academic performance. What better way to be physically active than spending time in the mountains, the forest, on the beach or exploring the countryside with your parents?
Source: Leila Falletisch – child play therapist, Somerset West
Date: 24 Mar 2009
